


Local Man is Stressed, an article by The Fantasy Onion

by marilynthedork



Series: Zone of Short Stories [3]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor, I Don't Even Know, Light Angst, Sickfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-07-10 22:19:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15958724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marilynthedork/pseuds/marilynthedork
Summary: Lucas Miller is stressed, but what's new? An unlikely person reminds him that taking breaks is good.





	Local Man is Stressed, an article by The Fantasy Onion

**Author's Note:**

> TAZ Fic Writers enabled this fic, and several awesome peeps make a cameo.

Lucas was, perhaps, a little bit stressed as the fall semester's finals season loomed over his campus. Complaints were piling on his desk daily, with seemingly no end in sight until students went home for winter break.

As the dean of the university, it was his responsibility to read the student surveys, and investigate any professors who scored low. He personally wanted to make sure he was hiring the best professors he could. Sure, there was a department for that, but all those surveys landed on his desk eventually. It was faster to cut out the middle man.

Additionally, he was the IT department. Sure, Mollbelline knew their way around the system they used for the curriculum (cutting edge technology Lucas was extremely proud of), but who did the professors come to when they didn't understand the system? They came to Lucas Miller, dean of Miller's School for Arcane Sciences. Every time an assignment didn't appear in the syllabus, or grades didn't show up for a student, or the system acted up, without fail, they would come to his office and ask him to fix it.

Which, usually, was fine. Except for the beginning and end of the semester. Between enrollment, finals, and a million other small fires that popped up during a given day, he found himself swamped with student feedback surveys and professor inquiries. 

The flu virus circulating around campus was not helping anyone, either. Students and faculty alike had been required to get the shot, but it only worked to reduce the most severe symptoms. It wasn't a preventative, much less a cure. He had professors cancelling class for entire weeks at a time, which left them unprepared for the final week of school.

So, in short, Lucas was stressed. He was used to stress, though. He had been stressed working on the Cosmoscope. He and his mom had been stressed working on making a second fake moon to house a secret organization that was saving the world. He had been stressed at thirteen when he graduated college. Stress was nothing new to him. It was an ever present thing you learned to work around.

He had always had his mom to help him work through it before, though. It was at times like this, with the busyness of finals and Candlenights soon, that he missed her the most.

His train of thought was interrupted by a sharp knock on the door. “Professor Miller, Professor Zach can't get any of the grades from his latest test to show up in our system.”

“Thank you for letting me know, Mollbelline,” Lucas sighed, jotting the complaint down on a sticky note and sticking it in a notebook filled with many other colorful squares. “Tell him I'll be there after class on Tuesday to look at it.”

“It's Molly, sir,” they reminded him, “But I'll pass the message on. By the way, have you taken anything for your throat?”

“What do you mean?” Lucas cleared his throat and took a sip from his cup of water “It's fine, I just needed a drink. We're good.”

Molly gave him a once-over, then pursed their lips like they wanted to say something they couldn't. “Yes sir, I'll leave you to it then.”

The door closed softly as Molly left. Lucas took off his glasses and massaged the bridge of his nose, right where a headache was forming. He hated sinus headaches most of all, because they settled behind his eyes and made reading painful. This one felt like it was going to be a doozey.

Another knock at the door, followed by a different secretary poking their head in. “Professor Miller, the Student's Health and Wellness Club asked me to remind you that they've requested a meeting with you today in… an hour.”

“Oh, right, that's today," Lucas sniffed, squinting at his notebook and a blue note that had the appointment on it. "Thank you, Shellabeth. I'll try to… clear off some desk space, I guess.”

“Yes sir,,” they nodded, “But, like I've said before, you can just call me Shell. I would prefer it, actually.”

Wearily, Lucas wrote another note and stuck it on the wall next to his desk.

“Anyway,” Shell drawled, eyebrows raised in concern, “Would you like me to make you any tea? You sound like you could use it.”

“I guess if you're already making it,” Lucas sniffed again, rubbing his nose subconsciously, “Maybe some coffee would be more appropriate, though.”

“...Yes sir,” Shell said after a moment of hesitation, letting the door close quietly once again.

Lucas had all of three second to attempt to breathe easily though his nose before there was an urgent knock on his door. “Sir, I have a parent who wants to speak with you immediately.”

“You know the rule, Chargaret,” Lucas massaged his temples in irritation, “I'm not allowed to discuss a student's acedmics with their parents.

“Okay, one: it's Charm. Chargaret isn't even a real name. Two, I don't think I can stop-”

Before she could finish her thought, Taako breezed into Lucas' office, Angus on his back, followed by a plucky secretary who looked thrilled to witness whatever smackdown Lucas was about to receive. "Nerd lord, we need to have a little fucking chat, my dude."

"Hello to you too, Taako," Lucas groaned, then coughed into his elbow. Gods, literally any gods who would listen to the prayer of a tired, sad nerd: why did it have to be Taako? "Are you here to challege my school to another ridiculous competition to decide which one of our schools has the superior academic and arcanic program?"

"Sadly, not today," Taako shook his head, "I wish I was here to kick your ass, natch, but I'm actually here about Ango."

The boy lifted his head up just enough from Taako's shoulder to look at Lucas and give a pathetic little wave, "Hello sir."

"So, Lucas, riddle me this," Taako started, stepping in further and plopping Angus down into one of the plush armchairs. When he whimpered, Taako put a hand on the top of his head and started combing through his curls, "Today I got a stone call from Angus, but when I answered, it was one of his friends on the other end."

"It was Dani, she's nice," Angus mumbled.

"I know, pumpkin." Taako cooed, "Anyway, she told me that Angus had to be walked back to his dorm in the middle of class because he was sick. And I was like, 'What the hell? He's sick?'"

"There's been... a bit of a flu bug circulating around campus," Lucas admitted.

"Anyway," Taako continued over him, "I came over as fast as I could, because I thought I raised my kiddo better than to show up sick to class and infect everyone else."

Angus tugged on the hem of Taako's shirt to ask him if he really just called him his son, and that it wasn't a goof, but Taako persisted valiantly, "Well, he said that they were already behind in class because the professor got sick last week, and that basically all of you clowns were sick, so it wasn't that big of a deal. So you know that I just had to come up here and see for myself. And he's right, you just some serious gunk spreading here. Even the dean's sick."

That certainly got Lucas' attention, "No he's, uhm, no, I'm perfectly fine."

Taako walked around the desk confidently and put the back of his hand against Lucas Miller's forehead. Which was just so unexpected that he ducked away with a quiet, "What the entire fuck?"

"Reality check, nerd lord, you're sick as shit," Taako chided. "Like, seriously, how long have you been feeling like shit? When was the last time you slept?"

"I, uhm, I slept… I…" he stammered, before sheepishly admitting, "I don't know."

"There we go, I solved my flu riddle," Taako put a hand on his hip, then turned to pick Angus up off the seat and hold him again, "Well, anyway, I need to put little man here to bed so he can sleep this off. And I suggest you do the same."

There was a pause as Lucas blinked at Taako owlishly.

"No, wait, that implies you have a choice," Taako realized after a beat, "Get some rest, Miller. Eat some soup, drink some tea, take a nap. Maybe even take a shower, it'll do wonders for you."

"Uhm," Lucas sniffled, which felt very gross and put even more pressure behind his eyes, "But I have a meeting…"

"Cancel it, doofus," Taako rolled his eyes, "Here, let me put it in nerd terms: take a medical leave of absence until it's been 24 hours since your last symptom of influenza."

"That's something else, Mister Taako," the secretary, who had watched the exchange in rapt silence up to this point, noted.

"You're probably right, Kath, but I don't really care. I got my point across, you can see it on his face."

Lucas shook his head to get rid of his dazed expression, before sighing heavily, "Okay, Taako, you're right. I clearly can't keep going like this. I'll take some time off."

"Good," Taako smirked. "Well, see you later, I guess. Come on, Kath."

"It's Kathtrilda, sir," the secretary said as she followed him out the door.

"He really likes nicknames," Angus explained, eyes heavy with sleep. "I have a lot."

"That's cause you're so easy to tease, bubeleh," Taako said warmly, kissing the top of his head. 

Lucas' heart ached briefly for that kind of parental comfort, but he moved it aside quickly. He could go home, make some of the curry he loved so much, and try to fall asleep. It's what his mom would have wanted.


End file.
